


Wasteland baby

by AgitoForestspirit



Category: origin: spirits of the past - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Other, agitoola rights, giniro no kami no agito, i love this movie with my whole soul, takes place pretty much right after events of the movie, they like each other but are pinning idiots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-04-27
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:09:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23880592
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AgitoForestspirit/pseuds/AgitoForestspirit
Summary: Toola is feeling tremendous amounts of guilt after what happened with her father's weapon and her desire to bring back her past. Agito is also pretty emotional but wants to comfort her. There are tears, there are hugs, reassurance, they are idiots who both definitely have a crush on each other.side note: the name of this came from Hozier's song Wasteland baby. I love the song and the album of the same name.
Relationships: Agito & Toola
Kudos: 4





	Wasteland baby

Toola curled her knees to her chest. The grass hill tickling her legs, tears welling in her eyes. She felt as out of place as she had when she first woke up to the ruins and the Forest. After what she had done, after Ragna and Estoc, these people must hate her now. Agito might hate her now. Her first friend but the person she had hurt the most. She wondered why he hadn’t just given up on her. Why he still believed in her after everything.

She let herself cry like she had the first time she sat on this hill. Sobbing til her nose was clogged and breathing became a challenge. Clinging to her legs Toola tried to inhale and only mangled to sniffle and gasp, trying to clear her sinuses as her sorrow overwhelmed her.

It wasn’t just the possibility of hatred and rejection. It was that she was all alone. Her father was dead. Her old life and everyone she had ever known. Gone. The one person she thought she could trust to change all this, turned out to be murderous and vengeful. 

She was hiding her face in her knees and trying tearfully to force out proper breaths when he heard footsteps on the hill path. Mortified at the thought of someone seeing her like this, Toola covered her face with her hands and tried to curl even tighter into a ball. 

“Hey. Are you ok?” The newcomer’s voice was familiar and gentle, and filled with worry. 

She rubbed her eyes but they only stung as she weakly looked at him. Standing several feet away in a baggy tan shirt and navy pants, standing still with his brows furrowed with concern. She could see the red top and collar still on underneath the t-shirt. His short silver hair looked pink in the fading daylight.

“Is it ok if I sit next to you?” Agito asked, wringing his hands together nervously.

Toola stayed quiet as she thought. Alone was the last thing she wanted to be. But she didn’t want judgement either.

“..sure.” She sniffled. 

He sat cross legged next to her, curling his fingers into the grass. She couldn’t tell if that was nervousness or a comfort thing. The grass had always been itchy and uncomfortable to her. 

“I cried earlier too.” Agito sighed and she looked back to him, noticing the redness around his eyes. She felt a tightness in her chest. She wasn’t sure what to say. They had both lost their fathers, although in very different ways. They both experienced trauma together. Yet again in different ways.

“Do you want to talk about it?” He asked, giving her a gentle smile that reminded her of the vile things she had said and done to him. 

Toola tried to take a deep breath but it was caught in her chest. “I don’t know. I just feel awful. I caused you so much pain.” Her throat felt tight. “I almost destroyed this place.” She dug her nails into her arm, tears falling freely. “I d-don’t know why you-y” her voice felt stuck, like her throat had closed up. 

He gave her a patient nod. “Yes?”

She sat there and tried to calm herself. Placing two fingers on her pulse to hear her racing heart. Toola rubbed at her eyes again, futilely trying to wipe away the tears. 

“I d-don’t know why you still care about me!!” Toola suddenly howled, sniffling through her clogged nose and trying desperately to stop crying as everything just continued to worsen. 

Suddenly she felt a hand on her shoulder. “What do you mean?” Agito’s eyes were wrought with distress. “You’re my friend.” 

“Why!?” Toola spat back at him. There was no venom in her tone, only pain. 

“Because that's what friends do. Care about each other I mean-“ he paused and removed his hand, glancing down at the grass. “..you do want to be friends.... right?”

Toola grimaced. “I still don’t understand! I don’t know why you don’t hate me! I put you through such terrible things-why do you still want to be around me....? I hurt you! You should hate me!” She heaved through tears, crying violently as her whole body shook. She had felt relief when the Forest brought him back to her, she had felt comforted in their hug, joy when he carried her down the mountain, but did she deserve any of that really??

She expected him to agree, to stand and leave her sobbing until she could calm herself down. Her emotions were her responsibility of course. Instead he hugged her tightly, tears biting at his eyes. Toola was frozen, unsure how to respond. 

“It wasn’t your fault.” He whispered. She could hear his voice breaking and couldn’t stop more tears from slipping down her cheeks as she shakily returned the embrace. 

“Wasn’t it though?” She said weakly. “I refused to listen to you. You begged me not to go with Shunack. You were afraid of him.... and I should have trusted you...”

Agito just held her still, trying to provide the comfort that might calm her panic. 

“I let Ragna chain you up.” She clung to him, convincing herself it was just because she was cold. “I treated you so awfully. I awakened....the mountain....the weapon.” She didn’t want to admit she needed this hug. That she wanted to stay like this, because that felt like weakness. “All of that is my fault.” 

Agito pulled away slightly, resting hands on her shoulder. “No wait, just wait, those things.” He struggled to find the words. “You did those things because he manipulated you. You thought you were doing the right thing. You didn’t know.” 

Toola’s chest stung with pain and stress. “So I shouldn’t be-r-responsible for my own actions??!”

He shook his head. “No you should still,” Agito locked his gaze with hers, deep green eyes shining from tears. She felt a little less shameful about her own tear stained face. “But you can’t tear yourself apart because you made a mistake- because you didn’t know all the facts- you didn’t know, yes, but blaming yourself just hurts you more.” That struck a deep chord and she roughly shoved his hands off and looked down. 

“A mistake that cost you your life!!” She yelled, crying and shivering violently. Agito’s eyes widened and he grimaced. All she could think of was the seconds before his sacrifice, shunack lifting Agito’s limp body by his neck. His agonized scream as his powers consumed him. How much she hated herself at that moment. “I don’t understand. Why not just give up on me??” Her voice got quiet, shaky. “How are you not angry. How can you stand to look at me???”

“Because you regret it.” He breathed, leaning forward and resting his hands on his knees. “Because people have the chance to learn. And grow from mistakes. We are all affected by the places and people around us. We all can choose to change.” Agito sighed deeply, tears finally running down his cheeks. 

Toola just stared at him, trying to process his words. “But weren’t you angry?”

He looked away, holding one shoulder as he forced the words out. “....I was. But not at you.” Agito turned his head back to her. Toola clutched at her chest as if that would calm the pain. “I was mad at ragna. At Shunack, who had convinced you he was right. I didn’t want him to hurt you.” He clenched his shoulder in his grip, deciding now wasn’t the best time to reveal what else the man from the past had done, why his father was gone so soon. “...I was hurt by what you said- but I knew you wouldn’t want the destruction he did if you knew how dangerous he was.” He finally let go of his arm and entwined his fingers, looking up at the sky lit in purples and oranges from the setting sun. The town awash in the colors as the light reflected off scarce glass windows. Toola was still looking at the grass. 

Toola’s voice broke as she said with deep sorrow. “I’m sorry I hurt you.” 

Agito looked back at her, smiling despite the sadness in his eyes. “It's okay.”

“No it’s not.” She replied. Her breath came a bit easier now. “I hurt you badly. You shouldn’t want to be around me. It's not healthy.”

“What?” He looked surprised. Hurt. 

“You had too much faith in me.” Toola whispered. Her eyes stung and she resisted rubbing them again. 

Now he just looked confused. “How? You were the one you saved us all in the end.” He gently reached for her shaking hand like he had in the volcano and she let him take it, secretly glad for the warmth. Agito held it and spoke with renewed confidence. “The moment you realized you had made a mistake you wanted to change. You wanted to make up for it.”

Toola’s eyes welled with new stinging tears and she leaned on his shoulder, squeezing his hand tight as she cried. 

“It's ok. Let it out.” His other hand moved to stroke her back and a wave of comfort washed over her. 

Without a second thought she freed her hand and threw her arms around his shoulders, clinging to him as she buried her face in his shoulder. “I still feel like it’s my fault. I feel like I shouldn’t have been so stupid. So naive... I should've known he just was using me!”

Agito stroked her back, biting back his own tears. “It's ok. You can’t beat yourself up like this. You don’t deserve it.” She curled into herself, still wrapped around him, squeezing him in search of warmth and touch. “You are so strong,” He whispered. Toola cried harder, trying to believe those words when all she felt was weak and pitiful. “You’re so kind. You are doing the best you can.” 

She sobbed into his shoulder as she clung to him. Still confused as to why he was being so kind when nothing required him to, But grateful for the comfort of the hug. 

“...t-Thank..you.” She said, her voice small and light. 

Agito squeezed her tight in response for a few moments and she felt truly safe.

“The city doesn’t hate me?” She asked as soon as she had the strength to speak again.

“No of course not.” He brushed away his tears and held her close. “All the elders here came from Ragna’s workforce years and years ago. They wanted something better and together, with hajan, Yolda and dad....they built it. No one here will look down on you for doing the same. That's not how you build a community.” 

Toola was shocked that she hadn’t known any of this before. But it made sense. Where would all these people have come from, if not Ragna?

“You’re refugees...” she realized. 

Agito nodded with pride. “You are too. You’re welcome here Toola, we won’t turn you away.”

Toola sniffled. “But i still feel awful.”

He moved back a bit and met her eyes. She didn’t want to hide her face anymore. “That’s because you care. Don’t be convinced you’re worthless or...or a burden. You’re worthy of being here. I don’t hate you. You’re my friend.” 

This time Toola reached for his hand and entwined their fingers. Agito blinked in surprise as he felt his cheeks warm. She smiled weakly, this talk had helped, and she was grateful. Even crying had seemed to help as she felt calmer by the second.

“You’re my friend too.” she said softly, lifting their connected hands. He held up his other hand and she gladly held it. They were both hurting and tired. Fragile to all strong and difficult emotions, they needed to heal. But they had each other, Toola thought, maybe things would be ok. “I want to stay here.” She said and Agito felt his heart swell. “With you.”

Agito stubbled over his next words as he hoped she didn’t notice his flushed cheeks, he smiled warmly. “M-me-t-too.”

Toola laughed a little and Agito raised an eyebrow and laughed with her. It felt good to smile this wide and Toola leaned forward again, laughing onto his shoulder.

“Am I that awkward?” He asked, grinning but embarrassed.

“No. Sorry i- uh- Its ok- i-I didn’t. I just understand that. I’m awkward too.” She let his hands go and held her cheek and rocked her shoulders. “I felt seen.” 

He draped his arms around her, smiling softly as his heart raced. “Hey...are you feeling any better?” 

Toola smiled genuinely. Trying to process all these feelings of comfort and safety and warmth. Things she had rarely felt from her father. 

They hugged tightly as she exhaled a much calmer breath. “Thank you.” She whispered, not wanting to let go just yet. 

“You too.” Agito replied, feeling much the same. 

They sat there on the hill by the well as the sun finished setting. Talking and processing everything they had been through. Toola stood from the grass as the night chill swept through the town. She reached a hand out to Agito and pulled him to his feet. Still holding that hand as they walked back into the city. She didn’t feel so alone anymore.

**Author's Note:**

> this can't be the first origin fic here???? RIGHT???? 
> 
> anyway thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed! There will hopefully be more from Origin from me but this scene is a one shot.


End file.
